fraidy cat

a conversation (monologue) with two who've been there, done that: papa says _study hard then next time be lawyer, earn big money_ mama says _don't anyhow think you're in love, also boys are liars_

accompanied with hard stares and very serious faces: _we know you're sensible, girl, we know you know we know best we only want what's best for you._

inwardly, I grumble what about what I want? too bad I don't quite know either; you see, I'm a bit of a jumbled mess now, mixed up with what I want and you want for me.

maybe it's better if a giant wave washes everything away on the twenty-first, as predicted, it would be a pretty easy way to go.

but i’m too afraid to die, but too afraid to live. or rather, i'm too afraid of dying to want to die, and too afraid of dying to dare to live anyway.