Optimism

A lot of really important stuff happened before you arrived. _It's all right; at least I got to sleep in._

That pretty girl from the coffee shop cancels dinner with you again. _Guess I get to kickback at home and watch movies._

You trip on a hose and sprain your ankle. _It could've been worse._

You lost your wallet in a bad part of town. _I needed to change the address on my license anyway._

You fall down an open manhole and break your leg. _Mini-vacation from work._

Your wife leaves you for your best friend, _More bed space, one less Christmas card._

You fall down a flight of stairs and become permanently paralyzed from the waist down. _Closer parking._

You sink to the deepest depth of human misery. _It can only get better from here._

A lot of really important stuff will happen after you leave. _It's all right (yawn); at least I'll get to bed early._